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My week for meeting LJ friends irl and what's a lesbian to do with a gazillion condoms? - Mo's Journal
March 26th, 2006
11:05 am

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My week for meeting LJ friends irl and what's a lesbian to do with a gazillion condoms?
I met two lj friends in person for the first time this week. I also acquired a gazillion condoms, through strange and wondrous events. I'm accepting suggestions in comments on what I might do with them. Keep in mind that I work somewhere where they give them out for free - large bowls of them everywhere - so even if I did have a use for them, I have no supply problems. Although the ones I got last night are more...varied than what's available at work.



On Thursday I had a lovely lunch in Chinatown with cherrypin_up. She and I met through fanfic - ff.net of all places! cherrypin_up was my first website designer, back when the idea of me having a website seemed very far-fetched. But she assured me that "if we build it they will come" and she built a beautiful site and they did. When we were first getting to know each other we talked a lot about slash and such, but also about kids and attachment parenting and relationships. We'd lost touch for a while there and it has been great getting reacquainted. And what fun to meet in person! She's as fun and sweet and interesting as I could have hoped for. Her friend Faye was thoroughly delightful, too (is she on lj cherrypin_up? I'd like to friend her). I hope the rest of their NYC vacation is going well. And don't forget to send me kid pics.

Yesterday I was thrilled to meet fellow X-Men fan talktooloose. We had lunch in my neighborhood and then he came back to my place and hung out for a while (and he was soooo sweet to my son and talked to him like an adult, which was much appreciated). I loved hanging out with talktooloose! We talked X-Men, we talked Jewish stuff, we talked gay stuff, we talked comics (although he and Doran did more of that - I mostly listened) and fandom and I felt like we'd known each other for years. And he gave me the absolutely coolest t-shirt that I think I need to go to a con to wear (or at least will have to explain constantly to anyone who sees it and the explanations would require more background if I were not at a con). I hope this will be the first of many rl meetings.

Last night my lover and I went to a dinner dance and silent auction sponsored by a GLBT organization she's involved in. She bid on a "party package" provided by a condom shop, because it had an iPod in it. And she won, so we went back to her place with the iPod (and a really nice basket that I'm scheming to appropriate) but also with a lot more condoms, lube, and vibrating cock rings than really are useful for someone living a lesbian lifestyle.

I did try giving some of the condoms (I can think of uses for the other stuff) away before we left. "How did you do that?" I hear you cry. Why, how would anybody? I walked up to random men and offered them some. One guy demurred a bit but I told him the night was young and he still might get lucky. Looking at the huge assortment of condoms I was forcing into his hand, he said "I've never been that lucky in my life." So, anyway, we came home with a gazillion condoms but we started off with a gazillion and a half.

And okay, so maybe I slightly overstepped the bounds of conventional behavior, but it was in a good sex positive cause. After all I'm the one who spends my weekdays with my work ID on a lanyard round my neck that says "Making the World Safe for Sex." And besides, I didn't really go beyond the bounds of good taste. My pitch was very discreet ("Hey, want some condoms? Here, please take some.") If I didn't have a very refined sense of propriety, I might have said, "Would you prefer the condoms with a local anesthetic for 'climax control'? Or perhaps some flavored ones - I've got a variety of fruit flavors here, plus vanilla and mint- which I think might provide a kind of nice tingle? Or maybe extra large? I do think some guys go for the extra large who don't really need them, yk, but it could be kind of impressive to flash the package in the bar." And I didn't say any of that. I am the apotheosis of discretion.

Current Mood: amusedamused
Current Music: What's love got to do with it?

(14 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments
 
[User Picture]
From:marag
Date:March 26th, 2006 04:58 pm (UTC)
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::is dead from laughing::
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From:talktooloose
Date:March 26th, 2006 05:26 pm (UTC)
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It's true; where to wear the shirt is a bit of an issue. heh.

Meeting you was lovely and it was not hard to speak to Doran as an adult as he seems a very mature and interesting young man. I will try to get around to sending him a list of recommended comics this week.
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From:mofic
Date:March 26th, 2006 08:09 pm (UTC)
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I'm sure he'd appreciate the list of recommended comics.

Hey, the remix came out. Remember I told you that since I remixed someone's romantic story to make it creepy I thought it likely someone would remix a creepy one of mine to make it romantic? That's exactly what happened!
[User Picture]
From:talktooloose
Date:March 27th, 2006 12:52 am (UTC)
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linkenstein, please.
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From:mofic
Date:March 27th, 2006 01:58 am (UTC)
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http://remix.illuminatedtext.com/dbfiction.php?fiction_id=368

I just did a post about it. I really enjoyed the story. It's amazing how different it is.
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From:chimosa
Date:March 26th, 2006 06:01 pm (UTC)
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"I've never been that lucky in my life."

hahahahha. Oh, that made me laugh. Hmmm... as far as what to do with too many condoms, I could poll my friends for possible, unconventional uses for them. Though considering the college I go to people will most likely say make an installation art piece or blow them up, attach them to a leotard, and create a post modern dance about them.
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From:mofic
Date:March 26th, 2006 08:10 pm (UTC)
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attach them to a leotard, and create a post modern dance about them.

I'll save some for you, and if you come over for honey chicken, brie, truffles and blackberries, I'll give you a bunch for dance purposes.
[User Picture]
From:chimosa
Date:March 26th, 2006 08:26 pm (UTC)
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yay! new and interesting ways to humiliate my dancers!
(Deleted comment)
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From:mofic
Date:March 26th, 2006 08:11 pm (UTC)
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Now where are you when I need good ideas like that? I had nothing better to offer than "there's always a first time."
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From:mofic
Date:March 27th, 2006 01:32 am (UTC)
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Oh, and I forgot to add - the really interesting thing about the vibrating cock rings is the packaging/marketing. The label says "vibrating rings" not "vibrating cock rings". There's actually *nothing* in the instructions that tells you what you put them on, although they are often packaged with lube (which also doesn't say what it's for, really, just what it isn't: This is not a spermicide) and/or condoms.

So, if you didn't know what it was, you could open the package and say "Oh, a vibrating ring. I wonder what the point is of having a ring that vibrates. Well, I guess I'll try it and see." ::pause:: "Gee, this is awfully big for my finger."
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From:cherrypin_up
Date:March 27th, 2006 03:34 pm (UTC)
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It was so awesome meeting you. I wish we'd had more time. I realized after we'd left you that we didn't pose for pictures together. And you in your pretty dress. But, I love the city so much. I am sure that we will be back.

Faye doesn't use her lj. It has no entries or anything.
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From:mofic
Date:March 28th, 2006 02:38 am (UTC)
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I am sure that we will be back.

Next time you should stay with me, at least part of the time.
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From:skyline3way
Date:April 20th, 2006 01:04 am (UTC)

Hi Dale!

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I just wanted you to know who it was that friended you!

Faye
[User Picture]
From:mofic
Date:April 20th, 2006 03:01 am (UTC)

Re: Hi Dale!

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Hey Faye! I friended you back, before I even knew who you were. Nice to see you here.

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