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Reminiscences - fifth story - Mo's Journal
March 15th, 2005
06:24 am

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Reminiscences - fifth story

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From:mofic
Date:May 10th, 2005 01:22 pm (UTC)
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But for those who grow up in the military, or in an era with those kinds of assumptiosn, it's a point of pride for children to enter the service, and even to die for their country. Or rather, the fact it was FOR a "cause" tempers the pain of their loss.

Yes, that's why there were Gold Star Mothers. I wonder how many people of my age or younger even know what that term means!

My son, btw, is fascinated by the military and it terrifies me. I hope he gets over it before he turns 18 (because I'd never sign enlistment papers) or, if not, that he decides to be a military historian...

He'd been meeting with a father who'd lost a child (don't recall the sex; son, I think) in a car accident. The father was going on about God's plan, etc., and my supervisor (believing that to be an unhelpful theology) challenged him on the notion. The father turned around and replied, "You'd rather I thought that my son's (?) death was just an accident? That God didn't care? That it was all meaningless? Well, maybe my view is more 'primitive' to you, but I'll take a God who cares over a God who doesn't." (That's paraphrasing, but the gist.) It's a really honest response that throws that view into a completely different light. I still don't agree with it, but after hearing that, I think I came to understand it better, and when I was doing hospice, I didn't try to push people out of believing it, as if it were 'better' for them not to. I didn't confirm it, but I didn't necessarily challenge it. There were bigger fish to fry.

Interesting story. I'm not sure whether I prefer a G-d who kills one's children to one who doesn't care, yk? At any rate, the counselor's job is to support the grieving, even those with different theological views, I'd think.

A death for a cause is enobling, in their eyes.

It is in mine, too. I do think people sometimes have to tie themselves in mental knots to make the death worthwhile, though...

Thanks for your comments!


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