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Life With a Young Adult or How Many 18-Year-Old Boys Does It Take to Change a Lightbulb - Mo's Journal
March 30th, 2007
12:14 pm

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Life With a Young Adult or How Many 18-Year-Old Boys Does It Take to Change a Lightbulb

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From:talktooloose
Date:March 30th, 2007 06:50 pm (UTC)
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Good to hear he's starting work on Sunday. Looking for a job means potentially getting the message over and over and over again that you are unwanted, unneeded, unqualified.

Eighteen year old boys are very possessive of their illusion of grandeur, masking as it does a lot of unmanly doubting. He reminds me of my 22 year old nephew Max who is in Israel now. I always knew Max would have to move himself far, far away from mommy and daddy to get his shit together which he really seems to be doing. If Doran can do it with you around, it will be really good for your relationship.

I love your combinationn of patience and prodding and bonus points for you for making him admit to your role in the teaching!
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From:mofic
Date:March 30th, 2007 07:23 pm (UTC)
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Good to hear he's starting work on Sunday. Looking for a job means potentially getting the message over and over and over again that you are unwanted, unneeded, unqualified.

Eighteen year old boys are very possessive of their illusion of grandeur, masking as it does a lot of unmanly doubting.


Good points! And in Doran's case this manifested as applying for one job at a time, absolutely sure he'd get it, then completely baffled when he didn't - until the next possibility that *of course* he will be chosen for presented itself.

I really hope this job works out. And I hope things work out for Max, too!

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From:talktooloose
Date:March 30th, 2007 08:29 pm (UTC)
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Max sat around his parents' house for months before flying to Israel even as my sister said, "Why don't you get a job? It wouldn't hurt you to have some more money in pocket when you get there."

But in Tel Aviv, he got himself a bartending gig (acces to "tons of chicks" he told me recently) and had to do things like take care of paperwork when it turned out he had slightly the wrong work permit. That kind of thing would have had him running desperately for mom if he'd been back in the States.

Now he's started an internship every afternoon with a film distribution company and is generally taking charge of his life.
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