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So What Exactly Is Sex? In fiction and in real life - Mo's Journal
January 12th, 2008
02:43 pm

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So What Exactly Is Sex? In fiction and in real life

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From:mofic
Date:January 12th, 2008 10:35 pm (UTC)
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I mean, if two couples were having sex in the same room, like at a play party or something, would mean they had sex with each other?

When you start talking about more people than two, I think it's a whole new ballgame. Two couples, each having sex, in each other's presence is really different (to me) from the question of whether two people alone together and each masturbating are having sex with each other.

I don't know. Maybe I should have asked whether masturbation *alone* is sex. I think many/most people would say not, in spite of the Woody Allen line ("Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.") But at least some of those people who would say that it's not would consider masturbating with someone else having sex, as both the poll results and comments suggest.

Another interesting wrinkle, I think, is the how context changes the answer for some. I put in some contextual variations (fictional or real, married or not). One that I think would result in even more variation would be: first time or not? i.e. If A has never had sex and then B gives A a hand job/blow job/fucks A, would you now say A has had sex? I think some people who would generally count a hand job between experienced partners as sex would not call a hand job sex if it's the first interpersonal sexual encounter. Or might think other contextual issues count, like minisinoo says: how old are they? did anyone have an orgasm? did they intend to have an orgasm? etc.
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