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And on a positive note - Mo's Journal
June 10th, 2008
08:11 am

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And on a positive note

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From:mofic
Date:June 10th, 2008 02:24 pm (UTC)
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Interesting about Gottman. I really like his books.

Have you read Pepper Schwartz?
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From:mofic
Date:June 10th, 2008 04:00 pm (UTC)
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One of the really interesting things I found with Schwartz's work was her concept of "near peers." These were heterosexual couples who tried for an egalitarian relationship, perceived themselves as being in an egalitarian relationship, divided up housework and so on in an egalitarian fashion. But at stress points - particularly when the two of them could not agree on a course of action - they defaulted to gender roles - men making decisions around money and work and women around childrearing. Every couple has points where you just can't agree and every couple has to come up with some way of dealing with that. And it so makes sense in a go-with-the-flow way to default to traditional gender roles. It's easy; it's expected. It's TRADITION (sung in my Tevye voice). But since same sex couples *don't* have that to fall back on, we have to find a new path.
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